For my brothers wedding.
Day 1)
Plane.
Aunt Silvana (whose idea of food is air) is catching the same plane as lisa and the mother.
Lisa is tres hungry.
Silvana passes her a square
"Have some, they're very healthy" she says.
Lisa takes a bite. No taste. Lisa has another bite.
At this precise moment, it feels like there was a party in her mouth and everyone died.
Then, going through customs, my mother, being the incredibly intelligent woman she is, forgets that she has put steak knives in her suitcase.
Half an hour later.
Almost on the plane.
Lisa's taste buds have finally revived themselves.
On the plane-
(boy a few seats behind who looks about fifteen)
"Mum, i've been pondering this for a while...."
Lisa listens intently.
"...What would happen if a cloud got sucked up into the engine?"
FACEPALM.
So lets fast forward to the night.
Family (Davd, Michael, Rebekah, Mum, Dad, Lisa go to Thai/Indian restaurant).
Lisa cannot eat spicy food.
Vindaloo is in the middle of the table.
Lisa does not know what this intriguing substance is.
She takes a bite.
Before her taste buds commit suicide, there is a fire in her mouth, that her taste buds have intended to cease by pouring gasoline and petrol all over them. And kerosene.
Taste buds dead for prolonged period of time.
And the apartment lisa is staying in is right next to a busy road.
Cannot. Fall. A. Fucking. Sleep.
Day 2)
Lisa gets woken up.
Not happy, Jan.
Parents are out because lisa tells them ever so nicely to please get out and not wake her up in the future.
So she watches music clips on television.
Time well spent.
Texts AJ+Jen+Bec during the day.
Remembers she must buy present for Priyanka.
taste buds still have not been revived.
Day 3)
Rebekahs hens party.
get up erly (sigh) and mother and lisa get in ca with Rebekah and her maid of honour Rebecca.
Confusing.
Lisa makes necklaces which say "beks Hens" on them.
Tantalising stuff.
Taste buds, still showing no sign of relief.
Clairvoyant arrives, after much waiting, Lisa gets a turn.
Clairvoyant says jenny and her will be taking a trip when school is over,
says beccy will enter a business soon.
Says Lisa is good at telling how people feel (apparently)
and will have seventeen year old boyfriend next year- star sign Taurus.
Apparently.
Lisa pulls out card with man stabbed in chest multiple times.
Clairvoyant does not explain.
Clairvoyant says lisa would be good in media.
Lisa jumps for joy inside.
Even though it is all a bunch of crap.
Clairvoyant reads palms,
lisa will have three kids apparently.
NOT HAPPY! I WANT MOARRR!!
Get in van,
socialises and takes many many pictures.
Go to restaurant.
Socialises more.
2 others called Lisa.
Overall good night.
(Y)
Day 4)
To the city.
Starts off shit.
Woken up again.
Father hogs the foxtel.
Catch bus to city (which is, in fact, hours late)
Father complains like a grumpy old prick about how all these shops are found in Perth.
Father wants to go to McDonalds
Silvana points out McDonalds is found in Perth.
Father more pissed off.
Lisa contemplates mass suicide.
Then to the ferry area.
Lisa does not like ferries.
Sees boy working at food place thingo who looks exactly like Kurt Cobain.
Freaks out.
Returns to normal.
Not really.
Makes retarded videos while on ferry, to stop herself becoming seasick.
Taste buds zilch.
Day 5)
wakes up too early.
Taste buds, nope.
dinner with uncle dom.
nothing to report.
Day 6)
Sleeps at mike + Beks house
sleps shitty!
meets pete (rhymes)
goes on facebook :O
Lovely cat.
horrible dog.
no taste buds to report.
Day 7) will do later
